10 Alarming Signs of Lust in a Man You Shouldn’t Ignore!

Updated On: August 3, 2023

Is it actually love or simply lust? Discover these 10 secret signs of lust in a man that can actually prevent your heartbreak in the long run.


Signs of lust in a man

Have you recently met someone who gives you constant butterflies dancing in your stomach? Or have you started seeing someone and longing for a bright future with them? 

Even better, are you already in a week-long relationship with the guy and enjoying your time together? 

Well, let me congratulate you first on finding someone special. But my dear, it is important to identify if this person is worth the time, effort, and attention before moving any further so that you don’t get hurt in the long run.

If you’re hoping for an ever-lasting future with a guy, you must ensure he is not simply lusting over you. 

Worry not at all. In this article, I’ll tell you the signs of lust in a man. It will help interpret his reality and guide you to make the best decision for yourself.  

Is It a Red Flag if He Is Lusting Over You?

See, my dear. It entirely depends on what you two expect from each other. Physical attraction and desires are common human tendencies, and it’s evident for your partner to feel sexually attracted to you. 

If you’re looking for a permanent relationship, only lust will not help you survive it. Again, if you’re up for some temporary fun, lust is the main thing you need. 

Either way, it depends on how you see things from your end and how you plan to take it. 

From Heartthrob to Heartache: Exploring the 10 Subtle Signs of Lust in a Man

See, my dear, physical attraction is integral to any relationship and helps spice up the equation between individuals. 

However, there are other ingredients for a successful relationship. If his only interest is in your body, I’m afraid that will not work out in the long run if you’re interested in something permanent. 

That’s why it is essential to discover the signs of lust in a man. 

Ready to dig in? Perfect! Let’s find out the possible signs he is lusting after you. I’ll use a particular storyline throughout the article to help you understand the signals with a practical touch.

1. He Moves Ahead Really Quickly.

A guy who is genuinely interested in you will take the time and effort to know you well, understand your comfort zone and initiate things slowly. 

However, for a lustful man, it’s the exact opposite. He is okay with moving ahead with things real quick and wouldn’t bother much caring about your comfort zone. 

I’ll give you an example that was very true in Tina and Deb’s case. 

Deb was keen to initiate “spicy conversations” with Tina right from the beginning when they had just started to know each other. 

While texting, he would flirt with her intensely and try to ignite something HOT right on texts. Further, he started talking about room dates within a day or two of entering into a relationship. 

So, be cautious. If a man is moving things super quick and planning to get physical within a few days of knowing you, it’s an early sign that he is lusting after you. 

2. He Is Only Interested in ‘Room’ Dates.

A girl and a guy on a room date.

A lustful man who is only into your body will only be interested in room dates. He will be interested in exploring you physically and doesn’t put any effort into knowing the real you. 

One of my friends had been through something similar. I wish not to disclose their names, so let it be Tina and Deb. 

When they started seeing each other, Tina was happy and had been planning for the future with Deb. However, Deb’s gestures were enough to let her know he was only interested in getting physical

She felt bad, but it’s good she saved herself from long-term pain. 

Tina’s phone would often beep with messages from Deb like:

“Let’s plan an OYO date tomorrow.” 
“Let’s book a room for our next date.” 
“When are we executing our room date?” 

Physical attraction is good, but if he only talks about confining it to a “room” and is less interested in socializing outside, that indicates he is lusting after you. 

If you’re looking for “temporary fun,” it might satisfy you. However, if you’re up for planning a future together, then this man isn’t for you. 

3. He Makes Last Minute Plans.

Another important sign that a man is only interested in your body is when he reaches out to you at his convenience, makes last-minute plans, and that too for hooking up. 

This scenario has been evident with Tina and Deb, where the latter would often bother Tina with last-minute plans. 

Because she liked him, she would try to cope with the plans. However, she soon realized this wasn’t something she was looking forward to in her life and decided to step back from the “casual relationship.”

Ask yourself: Is he usually making plans with you at the last moment? Does his plans mostly revolve around “having fun inside the four walls?” 

If so, my dear, it is a clear sign he’s a lusty man.

4. He Only Messages You at “That” Time.

A guy messaging a girl when he's horny.

By the term “that” time, I mean a particular moment when the guy is turned on and wants someone to satisfy his desire virtually. 

You will often see him messaging you at that time of the day when he’s feeling horny and wants you to reciprocate his feelings. 

I would again draw Tina and Deb’s example. There have been several instances when Deb would text Tina when he was horny and urged her to respond the same way. 

Again, it’s pretty cool and fun if you’re just about lusting for the guy. However, if you’re preparing for a future, this isn’t something you’d like to have in your life. 

Quick questions. Does the guy often message you when he’s heated up and wants you to cooperate with him? Does he love to play along in the texts and ignite the heat inside your body, too? 

If yes, this is a prominent sign he is lusting after you. In such a case, you’ll only find him texting you at certain times and unavailable at any other time. 

5. He Isn’t Interested in Showing You His Emotional Side.

A man only interested to satisfy his lust with you will never show you his emotional side

It’s like he is all ears when you are discussing intimate things with him but vanishes when it comes to emotional intimacy. 

This point was again true for Tina and Deb, where the latter would hardly ever show his emotional side to Tina, nor was he emotionally available for her during her tough times. 

Why? Because he was just there to lust after Tina, and nothing more sparked his interest. 

When a guy is interested in something more than just being physical, he supports you emotionally and doesn’t hesitate to show his emotional side to you.

6. He Licks His Lips Looking at You.

Now, let’s talk about the body language of a lusty man. 

One of the most prominent physical signs that he’s only after your body is when he licks his lips while looking at you. 

I can’t surely relate this to Tina and Deb’s case because I haven’t been to their in-person dates ever. LOL! 

You will find the guy giving you long gazes when you’re together. That’s out of lust, and probably, he can’t wait to enjoy a great time with you in bed. 

He might make flirty and sensuous comments about your appearance, further lighting up his desire to have “fun” with you. 

Think about it. Have you ever noticed the guy licking his lips while looking at you? Does he often give you sensuous gazes that express his ‘desire?’ 

If yes, it’s a clear sign of lust in a man.

7. His Friends Have No Clue About Your Existence.

When he is just trying to keep things casual between you two and is only interested in initiating a physical connection, the chances of his friends knowing you are extremely minute. 

If he is just after your body and interested in exploring wild fantasies with you, he won’t bother informing his friends about you. 

On the other hand, if a guy likes you more than just the physical part, he will always be okay introducing you to his friends and family. 

Tina and Deb’s case was no exception. Though they dated for two to three months, Deb’s gestures never indicated something more than lust. 

Deb would always be interested in hooking up with Tina and loved inquiring about her physical details or sexual fantasies. However, he was distant whenever it came to know about her friends and family

Coming back to you. Does the guy’s friends know about you? Does he talk about his friends with you? 

If not, then that’s a clear sign his sole interest lies in physical intimacy, and he is simply lusting over you. 

8. He Ghosts You Often.

A disappointed girl waiting for a message from a guy.

Physical desires and lust don’t ensure long-term stability. Hence, you might notice inconsistent behavioral patterns from the guy. 

If he’s lusting after you, chances are high that he has kept other girls as his “option.” Hence, he might ghost you entirely or disappear for a few days after he has used you. 

If he comes back after a few days, he’ll pretend as if nothing happened and get back to his ways to impress you sexually and seek his desires. Yes, my dear, that’s how things usually work when it’s all about lust and fun. 

In that short tenure, Tina faced this too, where Deb would often be unavailable and again got back at his convenience.

Over to you. Does the guy suddenly become unavailable, and when he’s back, he’s all about sex again? 

If yes, it clearly indicates that he only holds lust for you. 

9. Your Chats Revolve Around Only One Thing.

One of the other prominent signs of lust in a man is when he only initiates a conversation to talk about physical intimacy. 

When you scroll down your online chats or analyze in-person conversations, you’ll find your conversations mostly revolve around “fun and sex.” 

If a man wants something more than just your body, he will be interested in initiating different conversations, engaging, and fun-filled. If he is not doing that and is only excited to talk about hot stuff, it indicates he is lustful about you. 

Again, Tina had been through it as well. 

Deb would talk about a lot of sexual stuff, like how he is interested in exploring her body, how great he is in bed, and what amazing stuff he is curious to try with Tina. If Tina tried initiating another topic, he would get reluctant with his responses. 

Do your chats with the guy mainly revolve around sexual stuff? Does he usually message you to discuss spicy things and hardly talk about some other things? 

If you affirm, I must tell you, my dear, he is surely lusting after you.

10. He Isn’t Curious About You.

A guy who isn't curious about listening to what the girl is saying.

The guy is curious about your physical details. He’s curious about how you look. He is interested to know about the deep fantasies you hide inside you. 

But that’s it. He doesn’t want to go beyond that! He doesn’t want to know your hobbies or what you wish to pursue. And that’s what indicates he is lustful about you. 

He won’t show any sign of affection and instead would be interested in exploring your seductive side. 

When a man is interested in you, he will try to know you better, be curious about your day, and try to create a friendly atmosphere between you. If he isn’t genuinely interested in you and is only about your body, his curiosities will only revolve around that. 

Think about it. Does the guy put effort to know you beyond the sexual intimacy? Is he curious enough to ask you how your day went? 

If not, then it’s an indication he is lusting after you. 

Wrapping Up

With that, we come to the end of our blog. The above ten signs will help you determine if a man is interested in you and planning a future or is lustful after you. 

See, my dear, love, lust, chemistry, and attraction are all part of human intimacy. The thing that matters is what you expect from the person on the other side. 

A guy’s lusting over you is an obvious sign if you’re looking for casual fun and satisfaction. But, if you’re up for something serious in the long run, you need to know that a lustful man doesn’t serve what you expect. 

So, please decide wisely and choose what’s best for you, dear! 

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