Top 13 Qualities of a Good Man to Look For

Ever looked at your phone and felt a wave of dread at the thought of another bad date?

I’ve been there. Ghosted. Lied to. Disappointed. Again and again.

Then I met Ankit. Four years ago, he walked into my life and turned everything I knew about relationships upside down. How? By showing me what a good man actually looks like.

In this post, I’ll share 13 traits of a good man that’ll help you easily differentiate between a guy who’s a keeper and a guy who’s just gonna waste your time.

Let’s begin.

Uprisehigh is audience-supported. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. When you purchase through our link, we may earn an affiliate commission at no extra cost to you. Learn More

13 Signs of a Good Man Worth Keeping

1. He’s a Great Communicator

Hands down, being a great communicator is the best quality in any human being. It’s a great characteristic if he doesn’t suck at communicating.

• He’s busy with a meeting and can’t call you back. Your handset will beep with a message: “I’ll be a little occupied today with office work. I’ll text you back immediately when I am free.” 
• He sees you long-term. You’ll hear things like, “You’re important to me, and I’d love to spend my whole life with you.”
• He’s upset with you? He’ll let you know instead of beating around the bush and pretending to ignore: “I didn’t like how you talked to me yesterday. I’m a bit disappointed.”

This shows he’s not just an excellent communicator but an honest person too. He’s neither into playing games nor sending you mixed signals. He’s clearly vocal about what he thinks and wants for the future. 

2. He Takes a Genuine Interest in You

This is what I mean when I say genuine interest:

• The guy listens to you attentively and responds thoughtfully when you share something with him.
• He asks you deep questions about your personality, favorites, the last series/movie you watched, things you love doing, your routine, and so on. 
• He is an attentive memorizer and remembers every little detail you shared with them even though you forgot it yourself. 

Do you relate to these gestures with the guy? If yes, fantastic! You are on the right track, sweetie! 

3. He Takes Your Concerns Seriously

Gaslighting can affect your self-esteem and leave your mental health at stake.^[1] So, you must notice if the guy often gaslights you or takes your concerns seriously. 

How does he react when you communicate a particular problem or tell him that one of his behaviors upset you? If he responds in the following way rather than making you feel guilty for complaining, it’s a huge green flag.

• “I’m sorry that I made you feel that way. Let’s catch up and discuss this issue immediately.” 
• “I had no idea you were going through that. Please let me help you with that.” 
• “My apologies for the behavior that hurt you yesterday. I’ll take care of it going ahead. Let me compensate for the same by taking you out for lunch.” 

What could be more attractive than a guy accepting his mistake and willing to work on it? 

4. He Treats Everyone With Kindness

Think about it. Would you prefer being with someone who treats you like a queen but is outrageous with people around him? I’m sure you won’t because that signifies a fake, trash character (which is just temporary). 

So, how does a good man behave?

He treats people around him with empathy and kindness. He’s not deaf to other’s problems and treats people close to you with love and respect. Imagine if he’s so good with random people, wouldn’t he always treat his lover in the best way possible?  

5. He’s Open About His Interest in You

Trust me. I have seen way too many guys who are in committed relationships that never disclose about their partners to anyone just to have side chicks. 

I count it as a major red flag when men pressure their women to keep it a secret. There’s a lot of difference between holding things private and maintaining them as a secret. You keep things private from acquaintances, not from the close ones with whom you’ve always shared everything (coz that becomes a secret and secret are sus’).

So, when a guy is comfortable mentioning you to his dearest people, doesn’t act weird about being seen with you in public, or naturally introduces you to people he knows, it shows that he’s clear about his intentions right from the beginning.

6. He Celebrates Your Success and Happiness

Notice how the guy reacts when you achieve something, whether it’s a small accomplishment or a huge one. Is he always cold, or does he go mad with excitement?

If it’s the right guy, his celebration goes beyond a simple “congrats.” He remembers your struggles, understands what this means to you, and celebrates wholeheartedly. His joy for your achievements is genuine and consistent. 

It’s one of the best qualities in my partner Ankit, which made me fall in love with him. Be it as big as landing a new project or as small as cooking a new dish; he never failed to show how happy he was for every step I took toward my goals and every move I made for my happiness. 

7. He Respects Your Boundaries

A good man always respects everyone’s boundaries. He would never force her woman to change herself, her fashion sense, or pressurize her to get physical with him.

I’ve heard a few men saying the following things to their girls because they weren’t willing to agree to uncomfortable requests:

“Come on! I can’t believe you’re so prude!”
“Why can’t we get physical? Do you love me, or is it all a show?”
“I hate that you don’t like clubbing! It’s so much fun.” 

There’s no shame in clubbing or establishing a physical relationship with your partner with mutual consent. But it’s also okay if you’re not comfortable with the same. 

If he’s the right guy, he won’t ever overstep or blame you for being hesitant and shall give you the time you need. 

8. He Seeks Your Opinions

No, don’t get it wrong; seeking your opinions doesn’t signify the guy has a weak personality or is incapable to make his decisions. But it’s his way of making you feel you belong in his life. 

We have spent 4 years together, yet Ankit always seeks my opinion. I love that he always shows me how much I matter to him, and I try to reciprocate his gestures, too. 

Well, I won’t bomb you here with my love life details. My main point is that if the guy discusses his personal matters with you, is ready to be vulnerable before you, and asks for suggestions on different issues, that’s a great quality.

9. He Is Thoughtful With His Gifts

Now, what do I mean by being thoughtful?

Suppose you’re into classical music, and he gifts you a mug with your favorite classical music star’s picture printed on it. You’ll be thrilled, right? But, if he had given you the same mug with a pop singer’s picture, you wouldn’t have enjoyed it that much.

His thoughtfulness about you and the people close to him depicts that he pays attention to the little details and values the feelings of his dear ones. So, he chooses a gift or does the actions carefully, not just for the sake of it! 

That’s a quality only a few can master.

10. He Has His Own Life Too

As much as you’re important to him, he prioritizes his life, too. His world doesn’t revolve around only you (obsessiveness isn’t good in a relationship). He hangs out with his buddies, has time for his family, and devotes time to his work/studies. 

The icing on the cake is that he’s ‘cool’ with you having your recreational activities, too, like going out with friends, hitting the theatres, etc. If you know him to be exactly like this, that’s another great quality. It suggests he loves his life (or at least tries to) and has work to do rather than simply tagging along with his girl.

11. He’s Not a ‘Puppet’

It’s another great characteristic in a guy if he’s not always affirmative to what you say just to please you. It means, he isn’t hesitant to speak his own opinions.

Someone who says yes to everything you speak, to every opinion you have, to every action you ask him to do, is a mere puppet in the hands of his ladylove. 

On the other hand, someone with a strong character will convey their perceptions or won’t step back to disagree in some cases. And it’s not just with you but everyone around; the guy will hate being a “people-pleaser.” 

Trust me, girl. It’s way more attractive to date a confident man than an insecure boy. 

12. He Plans Dates

Every other quality is fine, but taking the time to plan dates? Ohhh myyy goddd, that’s so romantic!

A guy who’s actually invested in you doesn’t wait for you to make a plan; instead, he takes the initiative and asks you out.  You don’t have to beg for his time. He makes time for you, considers whether the place falls into your favorites, and makes arrangements that put a sweet smile on your face.

You see, sweetie, research says that developing a healthy relationship requires you to spend time together.^[2] Without it, it gets tough to know each other well. So, if you find a guy putting in that effort to keep things great between you two, he’s surely a good man.

13. He Speaks Respectfully About His Ex

This one’s really underrated but definitely a great quality…

It’s quite known how ex-partners don’t step back from shaming each other, be it with friends or on social media.

If he doesn’t do such things and chooses to keep a decent line while speaking about his ex, he’s one of the best men you can find in the entire universe.

• “It was tough between us, and it didn’t work out. Well, I have left it in the past.”
• “We didn’t make it through everything, which hurt that time. But we are both doing fine in our lives right now.”
• “Few things are not meant to be in life; I have accepted them and moved on.” 

You’ll only hear such statement from his mouth.

I’m not saying he will speak tons of praise for his ex, but he won’t make nasty comments, either. He will choose to keep it respectful and decent.

Actual Good Man Vs. Temporary Gentleman Behavior

We’ve all met those guys who seem perfect in the beginning but show their true colors after three months. You know what I’m talking about, right? So how do you tell if his gentleman behavior is here to stay or just something temporary?

This table will help you out.

🎭 Temporary Good Behavior	💚 Real Green Flags
Sweet texts only when he needs something	Consistent communication pattern
Big promises, zero action	Makes and keeps small promises
Different person in public vs private	Same behavior everywhere
Only remembers special occasions	Attentive to everyday details
Kind when others are watching	Naturally kind in all situations
Effort only on special days	Regular, everyday effort
Surface-level interest in your life	Genuinely follows up on you
Changes behavior after few weeks	Maintains consistent behavior

Wrapping Up

Great men aren’t unicorns. Yeah, they might be rare but they do exist! ( and now you know how to spot them)

Remember, it’s not about finding perfection. You just need to spot a good heart and a mature mind. So the next time you’re on a date, watch out out for these qualities in the guy. They’ll show you if he’s the right match for you.

And if you’ve already found someone who ticks these boxes? Congratulations! You’ve struck gold.

See ya next time.

FAQs

References

1. Sengkey, M., & Illahibaccus-Sona, S. (2024). Psychological and behavioral impacts of early adult women victims of gaslighting behavior in romantic relationships. INSPIRA: Indonesian Journal of Psychological Research, 5(1), 38–48. https://doi.org/10.32505/inspira.v5i1.7277
2. Hogan, J. N., Crenshaw, A. O., Baucom, K. J. W., & Baucom, B. R. W. (2021). Time Spent Together in Intimate Relationships: Implications for Relationship Functioning. Contemporary family therapy, 43(3), 226–233. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10591-020-09562-6